Friday, February 10, 2012

Ooh, Silly Life. So Unpredictable, Yet So Beautiful.

    Over the course of the past year, I have been evaluating my life. (I know, not a very normal thing for a teenager to do, but hey.) First of all, I've noticed for the first time how fast life actually goes by. When I was little, I always thought the old people were just crazy when they told me that I needed to have fun and enjoy childhood. I couldnt wait to get older and become a teenager. My younger child years are now over, and I find myself looking back and wishing I hadn't waisted so much time waiting for the future. Now that I've realized this, I try to not look forward to things as much or think about the future as often as I once did. I used to dwell on what was to be, instead of living in the presant but this last summer taught me some very valuable life lessons. Actually, last summer changed my life. I met new people that, even though they have no clue, taught me things about myself I never knew. They changed my life. They dont know this now, nor will they ever, but I always will. I often find myself thinking about them at the most random times. Quite a bit actually. I find it funny how they dont even have a clue about how much they impacted my life. Because of these two people, I'm a totally different person. They finally made me realize that I'm not as worthless as I used to think, and I am just as good as I make myself. They taught me that if I believe in myself and take a chance, that good things will happen in return. They didnt mean to, they dont even know, but I do and that's all that matters. Even though they thought we were just having fun and hanging out, they taught me so much. Funny how life works that way, huh? Now, almost five months later, we dont talk often, but they will always be in my heart. I never imagined in a million years that two simple people would teach me so much, unintentionally change my life, but they did. Ok, so this wasnt supposed to be about that at all, but it feels good to finally get that out of my system lol! Well, anyway, the second thing I've noticed while evaluating my life, is that it's totally unpredictable. People have suddenly brought themselves into my life that I've always known, but never really payed much attention to. Some of these people have become my really good friends in a short period of time. There was one really good friend that I made a couple of months ago that I had heard my friend talk about a lot the past couple of years, but I never expected to be friends with him myself. Some how, we started talking. We talked for almost two months, and then we started DATING! Now, I'm not going to lie and say it was wonderful becasue we only dated for three days, but still. My point is that the strangest people can come in and out of your life before you even realize it. Life is strange if you think about it. I always used to think I had a boring life where nothing ever happened, but now I realize that I was wrong. My life is crazy, hectic, insane, but most of all, is beautiful. It's beautiful because it's mine, and there is no one else that lives a life exactly like it. It's unique and sometimes painfull, but over all wonderful. If you wish, sometime just look around and think about yours. Think about all the strange parts of it that you never had before. Think about the people in it, how they got there. Sometimes when you take time to sit back and reflect on yourself, you discover things that you never saw before. It can be scary at first, but then it becomes an interesting habbit. Sometimes when it's quiet or I'm alone, I like to reflect on what's going on around and what new things about my world I have never thought about before. It's definitely worth the time.


  1. Amazing! Bravo! Love it!

    Also, you know more than anybody else probably, I also have felt all worthless to the world and such, and I feel like there have been people that God just threw at me, saying, "Listen to them and find out who you REALLY are!!!" You ever felt like that? It's been a rocky road, a wild roller coaster, and it still is and probably will be until I die, but I still love it anyway because it's mine and I can control it and be me! :)

    Thank you for sharing this, Amadee! I'm inspired by your words. ^_^

  2. Hmm..I've never really thought about it like that but now that you say something I can totally see it! This was just something that was on my mind last night and I had to get it out somehow lol :)