Monday, December 5, 2011

I Am The Girl...

   I am the girl you see with a book in her hand every chance she gets. I am the girl who loves music almost as much as herself. I am the girl who puts others first, the one who loves the Lord more than anything and will stop at nothing to keep her family safe. I am the girl who tries to do what's right, always tells the truth, and worries a little bit to much. I am the girl you can trust with all of your secrets and know in your heart that I wouldn't say a word.  I am the girl that tries hard not to care what people think but doesn't always succeed. I am the girl who loves to write, the girl that has an imagination bigger than the world itself. I am the girl who is always thinking, even in her sleep. I am the girl that sits in class daydreaming out of the window with thoughts running through her head that no one else could decipher. The girl who thinks outside of the box. I am the girl who is only me, the one thing that I try to be. I am me.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Buried Alive

    I could hear the muffled sobs of my friends and family through the closed wooden door that kept us apart.
 Dont Cry.  I tried to tell them, but my mouth wouldn't move. I'm not dead I promise! I knew that, but they didn't. Everyone else thought my soul had departed itself from my body and made its way to a new place, but I knew differently. I knew were it really was, the truth. It was still tucked away inside my body, the same place it had been for the past fifteen years of my life. My body, on the other had, was somewhere it had never been before. I was being forced to attend my own funeral, but my heart was still beating. In fact, the longer I laid in that coffin, the harder it began to beat agains the walls of my chest.
    "Not my baby! She was to young to die!" I wasn't dead! What about this did they not understand?
    "It's ok. She's in a better place now."
    No Dad, I'm not! I"m still here, right in front of you! Would he miss me? Would anyone miss me?
  I felt a tear roll down my cheek. Maybe someone would see that I was crying! Maybe they'll realize that I'm alive!
  No such luck. NO one noticed. I tried to move my arms, even just a little, but nothing happened. I tried to say something but only I could hear it.
  Please! Help me! I screamed, but only I could hear it.
    My coffin started to move. They were putting me in the ground.
  Again, I focused all of my energy on opening my mouth. It didn't work, I was doomed! I was going to be trapped, six feet under thousands of pounds of dirt, grass, and all things living. There was nothing I could do now, but I wouldn't give up. Soon it was going to be to late but I refused to die without putting up a fight.
  They were lowering me down now. My chances were almost up. I was terrified. Sad visions of death flashed through my head. I shuttered at the horrible thought of being stuck here in my own personal dungeon-like coffin.
  I felt myself hit the ground. An avalanche of dirt fell upon me like snow off a mountain in the middle of winter. I laid there, silently, for what seemed like eternity. Gradually, oh so gradually, I was finally able to move my body. I clawed with utter desperation, trying to escape.
  "Help me! Help!" I screamed. "I'm alive! Can anyone hear me?" I knew they couldn't. My voice echoed against the sullen walls of the box that contained me. I laid down my head in surrender. It was over. I was over. This is where I would lay, from now through eternity.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Heart Break Love


          She loved him. She had loved him her whole life. He was on her mind where ever she went. They were together most of the time, but when they wernen't, he was still in her head. No matter where she was, he was always there. Just like a song that wouldn't quit playing. Nothing he could do would ever make her stop loving him, but it might make it impossible. He made her feel valuable, he made her feel happy. No amount of time she could spend with him would ever be enough, not even forever. But it didn't last forever. SHe knew things would never be the same. Not between them, and certainly not for herself. He was a big part of who she was and without him, she would never be whole. She hadn't the foggiest idea of how to live her life without him. Was it even possible? She was broken and torn, not sure ho to be happy if he wasn't in her life. She'd force a smile on her face even though it hurt, because a sad smile was better than no smile at all.
         He loved her. He always would just like he always had. He'd known her for as long as he could remember, and she meant the world to him. More than anyone else he'd ever known. She had always done everything with him, given him the chance to live on the edge. With her he shared the best times of his life. She was the one that knew him better than anyone, just as well as he knew his own self. She had turned him into the man that he was just by loving him the only way she knew how. By keeping his secret, he knew that she was hurting and, in return, it broke his heart. He hated to see her in pain, and he couldn't stand that the reason was him. Guilt tore through his body like a fire burning in the forest. He knew his life would never be the same without her in it. He was forever broken, unmendable. He knew by ending it, he was doing the right thing despite the pain it forcedhim.
        Three years later, she found herself in her junior year of college. The initial sting of losing him hadn't disappeared, but turned into a never ending ache. She kept the smile on her face, determined to be strong but never willing to forget the boy she had once loved. Still loved. She would never know the truth. All she could do was hope and pray that one day maybe, just maybe, her knight and shining armor would come looking for her once again.
       He never imagined that this much later in his life he would still find her in his dreams as he lay asleep in bed at night. Just as he predicted, his life had not been the same without her. When she left, she took a big part of him that he wasn't sure he could ever get back. At times, he tried to deny it. He went as far as to try to hate her even though it was him that did wrong, but of course, it didnt work. No matter how hard he tried, his love for her would never fade. He culdn't take it any longer. He picked up his phone and ddialed her number. His stomach twisted and turned with every ring, but after what seemed like eternity, he heard silence, followed by a familiar "Hello?"

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Be Yourself. Everyone Else is Already Taken.

   Love yourself. That's one of the most important rules of life. If you dont love yourself, then you wont be able to know yourself and if you don't know yourself, then neither can anybody else. Be who you are inside because if you tried to be someone else your life would be a lie and you would never have the chance to be as happy as you possibly could be. It would be hard to fall in love with someone else if you didnt already love yourself because how could you expect someone else to love you if even you couldn't? God made you just the way he wanted to. That in itself makes you beautiful. Just remember this next time you look in the mirror and feel like your ugly or wish you looked like someone else. If God wanted you to be another way, then that's how he would have made you. But instead, he made you YOU!  Embrace it, love it, because there is no one else like you. If you know you're beautiful, so will everyone else. Be the best you you can be. Stand up for what you believe and say what you think. Love yourself, be yourself, define youself.


    "I'm not a perfect girl. My hair doesnt always stay in one place, and I spill things a lot. I'm pretty clumsy, and sometimes I have a broken heart. My friends and I fight and maybe some days, nothing goes right. But when I think about it and take a step back, maybe, just maybe, I like being UNPERFECT.."

     Story of my life. I'm not perfect by any means, nor do I want to be. Imagine how boring life would be if we did everything right all the time? I mean, the idea sounds great and all, but really if you think about it, I would be pretty suckish. Everyone would always over-rely on you because they would know you would do things right. Helping people is wonderful, dont get me wrong. But the stress of everyone expecting nothing less than the very best  of everything would be extremely tough. Besides, if you never made any mistakes and nothing ever went wrong, then the chances of you being close to God is pretty slim. You would probably forget to think him for the things you have because everything would be wonderful all the time. You would have no reason to ask for his help, or for forgivness for that matter. That's a big part of forming a relationship with the Lord. I supposse part of being perfect would also include being a perfect christian, but it would be hard if everything went right all the time. Besides that, the excitement of not knowing if everything will be ok keeps life interesting. Let's face it, most of the time things end up just fine anyway but being unperfect is part of what makes life so wonderful! If you mess up, it's ok because as a wise man once said "Plenty of thing's are mistakes, but some mistakes are like seeds and they grow into purposes."

Monday, November 14, 2011

ROFL!!! :D


I don't know about you guys, but this happens to me all the time. Sad day :'( 

Haha!! Soooo true! Typical boy :P

I stubled across this website's my official new favorite :-D This picture above is one that I downloaded from there. They crack me up!!

Sunday, November 6, 2011

"Oh, The Places You'll Go!"

      "You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. Your on your own and you know what you know. You are the guy who'll decide where you go."

This is yet another quote by Dr. Seuss from his book, "Oh, the Places You'll Go!". His words always inspire me. This quote reminds me of what my parents used to tell me when I was younger. "If your friends jump off the side of the cliff, would you jump to?" Sometimes I wanted to say I would, just to be difficult. I dread growing up and getting out on my own, but this quote reassures me. I do have brains in my head, and I obviously have feet in my shoes. I have the capability of steering myself in any direction I choose. When I get on my own, I will still have the knowledge that I already know so I will be just fine. Sometimes, you may be tempted by other people to take a path in life that you know will only eventually lead to a dead end. You don't have to choose that path just because that's where people are telling you to go. Ultimately, you are the one who decides your where you end up. If you keep this in mind, you will make sure to end up where you desire instead of someplace that will lead to no good. It's your life, live it your way!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Good Apples

Girls are like
apples on trees. The best
ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don't want to reach for
the good ones because they are afraid
of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
just get the rotten apples from the ground
that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples
at the top think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right
boy to come along, the one
who's brave enough
to climb
all the way
to the top
of the tree.

I stumbled across this quote a couple of months ago, and found it quite true. I had never thought about love that way, but being a teenage girl in highschool, it makes perfect sense. All of the boys go for the gorgeous, flirtatious girls that are easy to get...just like the apples at the bottom of the tree. They dont want to work very hard for good girls that they, deep down inside, know that they truly want because they are afraid that they might fall and get bruised. The thought of this scares them, that's why they go for what is easily obtainable to them already. Because of this, the girls at the "top of the tree" feel like they arent good enough or special enough to be loved by any of these boys. What they (well, I guess I should say we) dont understand is that just because they dont feel like they are noticed, they are...and they are just as good as the apples on the bottom. When the right guy is willing to come along and climb all the way up to the top of the tree for you, that's when you realize that all of your time spent waiting and staying true to your values at the top was well worth it.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Passionate Regret

 A dazzeling glare
     From the white sand
            even on breathless days
                  A fat freckled boy
                         With the star
                             That seemed
                     To perch upon the tip
                              Of his finger
                          Filled with
                  Passionate regret

This was a poem I wrote for english class yesterday. We have been reading "Enchanted Bluff" by Willa Cather lately and our asignment was to write a poem out of only words we found in the story. I thought it would be difficult but I actually finished within five minutes. I really liked this asignment so I thought I would share :)

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

My 4th Wish...

    My fourth wish is something I've thought long and hard about. I've discussed this with my friends and they all tell me I'm insane and slightly creepy, but I've got it all planed out...I want to marry Bruno Mars.
   I would ask Adele to be my bride's maid, and since she's originally British, we would have our wedding in Britain to honor her. Because I don't think there are any oceans in Britain, (don't worry, I'm not stupid...I know the Gulf of Mexico is there and that is very clearly an ocean [Ok, I'm just kidding. Don't go calling the nut house to come pick me up or anything uncalled for because I've already had that experience and believe me, its not fun. Alright, I've never had that experience but it sounded cool right?]) we will just get married by a huge lake at sunset. Taylor Swift will also be one of my bride's maids, along with Colbie Caillat and my cousin, Ava. Adam Levine will be Bruno's best man, and standing next to him will be my brother, Schuyler. Cee Lo Green is going to be the generous man to permanately bring our tightly bonded love together untill death do us part (a.k.a. our preacher).
    During our reception, Bruno, Taylor, Adele, and I will preform a mini concert on a roof-covered dock for our guests. Everyone will cheer us on and afterwards, we will all dance to loud music and have a good time. I will then, for the rest of my life, live together with Bruno Mars in the beautiful Mars mansion.

Sounds practical, huh?

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

My 3rd Wish...

       Can anyone guess what my third wish could be? Eh, probably not...I'm a confusing person lol :) My third wish would be to  gain the power of invisibility.  Think of all the things you could do! Life would be turned into an endless ride of power and fun. Why power you ask? Well, just think about it. You would have the power to do whatever whenever you wanted, not to mention actually having power over people. Not that I would really want to have power over any human being, but the choice of doing so would always be there. Now, I know you are wondering how in the world you could controll someone when they couldn't see you, right? Well, the answer is simple. It would actually be easier to controll someone if you wern't able to be seen. Not that I would know this from personal experience of course, just commen sense. You could move things around and make sounds, and everyone would think you were a ghost, therefore causing them to do things for  you out of pure fear. I wouldn't want to controll people by fear, but there would definitely be some other things I would do. Scaring people would certainly be at the top of my list. I would walk around different class rooms in my school and go up to some random person and whisper something in their ear only loud enough for them to hear. They would look around and realize that no one else heard my voice. I would then ask them a question in which they would answer, causing everyone else to think that the person was going crazy. I might even follow them around all day doing that...Wouldn't it be hillarious???? that I think about it, that wouldn't exactly be very scary, but it sure would make me laugh!! :P

Monday, September 26, 2011

Why, Hello there!! =D

       So, right now I am sitting in my fourth hour multi-media class and I am bored out of my mind. As I was surfing the internet, I mysteriously stumbled upon my blog and thought, "Hey, why not."

      I was reading over some of my recent posts and realized that it's starting to sound a little preachy, which I dont want at all. When I find a quote that I like, I feel the need to back it up. I'm mostly trying to explain it to myself while I'm typing, so I pitty, yet greatly appreciate, anyone who is  reading this.

      If you're wondering how I'm having time to blog during class, the answer is simple. We are leaning all about how to make power point presentations, which I learned how to do years ago in elementry school. It's super easy so I skipped ahead and got everything done. Boy, do I love this class :) There's nothing better than an easy A!!

Monday, September 19, 2011

Imperfection is Individuality

         "The biggest challenge in life is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everyone else." --Unknown

      I'm sure you've had someone tell you sometime in your life to just be yourself. I dont want to sound cliche or anything, but I've recently found out how important being yourself is and I would love to share my knowledge with anyone who is reading this. The modern world is about making everyone "normal." But what really is "normal?" Does anyone even know? No. We don't. Some people think that if you're not like everyone else, then that makes you a freak. Does it? Of corse not! It's indeed one of the dumbest things I have ever heard.

          "Be whoever you want to be. People are going to judge you no matter what you do." --Unknown

Have you ever noticed that when you try to be like someone else because they are "popular" or "cool" or what not? How did that work for you? Not very well I presume. From personal experience, I know that people tend to like you less when you try to act like someone else other then yourself. Let's face it, people are going to judge you no matter what. since you are getting judged either way, why not be yourself? It's so much easier and, not to mention, fun. When you are trying so hard to be something your not, you end up focusing all of your energy into that instead of living your life to the fullest and having fun. What's the point of living if you cant have fun doing it? It doesn't matter what other people think of you. The only thing that matters is what you think of yourself because if you aren't in love with yourself, then you can never learn to love anyone else and life without love is no life at all. As I quoted the first time, its really hard to be yourself in a world that is trying to turn you into someone else, but chalenges are always fun. Why not give it a try?

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Scary Timing

         Have you ever truly thought about the meaning of time, or just time in general? It's a scary thing. At one moment, you can be having a great time and then POOF!! it's over and you find yourself laying on your bed at night wondering how that could have possibly gone by that quick.
   I used to be the kind of person that would look forward to something so much that it was all I could think about, but now, I'm trying really hard not to do that, though often I still struggle. It's no use to think about the future so much that you spend all of your time wishing that day would come sooner because when it finally does come, it happens way to fast and before you know it, the thing that has completely occupied your mind for the past month is already over. What's the point in wasting your life looking forward to something that goes by so fast? I finally understand why people always used to tell me, "Don't wish your life away." If you spend all  your time wishing for something to happen, then you don't get to live the life you have right now at this very moment.
     The thought of getting old scares me, and though I'm only fifteen, it seems like its comming quick. In three years, I'll graduate high school. After that, college, and then who knows what. My life has gone by so fast already. I remember just starting kindergarten. The thought of ever not being in school seemed impossible. Now, in all reality, its almost over and it all happened so fast. Time is a scary thing, probably my biggest fear actually. If you really think about it, its petrifing. Every word you say, after it has come out of your mouth is history. Every movement you make, as soon as you make it, is already history. It's in the past. Every breath you breathe, every step you take, every sound you make, is history as soon as it happens. What's even more scarry is thinking about the future, like I said before, it comes and goes in the snap of a finger and there is absoutely nothing you can do about it. Sure is freaky, huh?

Thursday, June 2, 2011

My 2nd Wish

I'm sitting in the wating room at a hospital waiting for my mom to go into surgery. She is getting breast reconstruction for the fifth time. There has been so many complications that it has reqirued multiple surgeries to get it right.
My mom had breast cancer about five years ago. Luckily, they found it early so ut was easy to treat. If wishes came true, I would wish that my mom never had cancer so she wouldn't have to go through all of the pain that it has caused her.

Friday, May 27, 2011

More Dr. Seuss

Sometimes I like to look up quotes when I'm bored. Most of the time when I find Quotes that I absolutely love, they are by Dr. Seuss. I think he is absolutely brilliant. The most recent quote I found of his was "You have brains in your head. You have shoes in your feet. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. Your on your own and you know what you know. You're the guy who'll choose where you go." I think this has a lot of truth behind it. You have to make your own decisions, and you can't let other people try to influence your actions. You have to think for yourself and do what's right. Dr. Seuss has a Way of saying something important but makes them easier to understand. I think this man is a creative genious.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Dr. Seuss

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matte dont mind." This is a famous quote from one of my favorites, Dr. Seuss. If you think about it, there's nothing but truth in that little sentence. A person could live a very happy life if they believed this in there heart, and truly lived the life Dr. Seuss is trying to explain. When he says Be who you are and say what you feel he is trying to say that you need to be yourself, because that's who God meant for you to be. If you try to be someone your not, you will never be as happy if you were just being. you. Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter dont mind. Have you ever came across someone who would be mean to you when you were acting like yourself, but when you started to act like someone else, they were perfectly ok with hanging out with you? Those are the kind of people that you should probably stay away from. If they can't except you for you, then you don't need them. The people who stick with you no matter what mood you're in, how you look that day, and even when you say a stupid joke and laugh at yourself when no one else thinks it's funny, are the people you need most in your life. They are the one's who matter, because they love you for who you are, not who you pretend to be. I really hope I don't sound like I'm trying to preach to you, because I'm not lol. This quote means a lot to me, because it has helped me realize who my true friends are. If you like my blog so far, you should share it with your friends. Do you remember when your kindergarten teacher would tell you to share the toys with the other kids? Pretend like this is kindergarten, except this time sharing won't be such a bad thing :)

If Wishes Came True...

Wouldn't it be awesome if everything you wished for always came true? You could have anything you wanted. If I could wish for anything, it would probably be  a giant blue giraffe with neon yellow spots. IT WOULD AMAZING!! When my friends would come over, they would be like Woah!! Whats that giant blue thing out there? Then i would say...Why it's a giraffe of course!!

If you could wish for anything, what would it be?

It would be cool if you had the power of making your wishes come true. You could wish yourself out of uncomfortable situations, like when your parents are giving you "The Talk." I would deffinately wish myself out of that one :P You could wish for the person that you've been secretely watching and dreaming about for the past year to come and talk to you...and unlike all of the other times when you've wished for them, it would actually come true :) If wishes came true, then your world would be filled with endless wonder and fun. Oh, if wishes came true...

Friday, May 6, 2011

The Begining

Hi Everybody!! I was trying to think all day today in class what to name this thing. I just couldn't come up with the right one. My friend saw me writing possible names down on my "thought journal" and decided to help me. We made a big list together of possibilities, and finally came up with this one. I thought it fit well. Thanks Shelby!! :)